Posts by Hiding Questioner

303

I've been outed...

by brotherdan in

jw
friends

so this weekend my wife had a major grand mal seizure for the first time in her life.

she was rushed to the er.

a few hours later while i was at her side she had another major one.. it was the scariest moment in my life.

Hiding Questioner

"You guys don't realize how in love I am with my wife. She is my everything. And this religion shit all over it."

Isn't it amazing what this religion can put us through. I too loved my ex wife very much and had to sit back and watch as family, friends and the WT tore it to shreds only to blame me through lies and slander. It felt like shit and the pain was unbearable. Yes, just when we need help, sympathy, understanding, a listening ear and hugs we get shunning, unfounded accusations, guilt, isolation and loneliness.

As others have said, hang in there. I quickly learned that, to take all the blame and torture yourself with guilt, is to let the WT "win" and I refused to let that happen. Unlike me (my hell was 15 years ago before life-saving forums like this existed) you now have us and our collective wisdom and experiences to draw on.

Unlike the JWs, we're here for you.

HQ

23

Eek! A Male!

by laverite in

"eek!

a male!

treating all men as potential predators doesn't make our kids safer."http://online.wsj.com/article/sb10001424052748703779704576073752925629440.html.

Hiding Questioner

"And I've worked with men who were abused by women."

This happened to me as a JW.

HQ

31

My conversation and growing friendship with a 68 year old Witness (a victim of the '75 lie) Most older witnesses know something isnt 'right.'

by Joliette in

great friendship that i'm growing with a older woman here in milwaukee.. she's a really nice woman.

i like talking to her, and she tells me that she tries to listen to the 'younger folks.

' she said, she actually enjoys talking.

Hiding Questioner

She sounds just like my mom, who was anointed. She passed away 10 years ago.

HQ

25

Stumbled across a recurring theme in WT: teach 'the organization' to your kids

by sd-7 in

jw
friends

yesterday afternoon, right before i was about to take my wife to the kingdom hall (no, i'm not attending, haven't been in 9 months, strangely enough am still thinking of returning if it would help my marriage, but it won't), i happened to notice her opened october 15th, 2010 watchtower.

around page 25 or so, there was an article that caught my eye.

it instructed parents to teach their children to 'not act independently of the organization, even in small matters'.

Hiding Questioner

"To some degree, this organization has become self idolatrous."

In a public talk several Sundays ago the speaker said, and I quote "....Let's us not forget, we all made a dedication to an organization....". I had to get up and take a walk outside.

HQ

64

Strange, Offensive , Weird Statements on DFing Offenses in Elders Manual

by flipper in

jw
friends

you really can't make this stuff up.

but an organization like the wt society bent on controlling virtually every aspect of the typical jehovah's witness life - would make this up to keep their control through the use of fear and guilt.

so- i thought i'd share what i thought was the strangest, most offensive, weird language dealing with what the wt society calls " disfellowshipping offenses " .

Hiding Questioner

"They hadn't thought of any other possible scenario, my innocence was not fathomable.....They had it written down like it was an actual crime that had taken place and I was accountable for my whereabouts. I was surprised how sure of my guilt they were. They wanted to catch me soooo bad. It was so exciting for them to play cops and robbers, lording thier special book of rules over people. It was so dissapointing for them. They were genuinely upset that they could not Df me."

Sounds all too familiar! Based solely on my wife's false accusations, elders and so call friends could not possibly fathom my innocence and for years have maintained my guilt. From the moment she made her claim (to cash in on our real estate holdings $$$) I was guilty and from that point on the only efforts made were to confirm my guilt and justify all the activities being undertaken to prove my guilt. And, no one ever questioned her motives and where did she suddenly get all her new found money!

For months I felt I had to justify my every move and location. Since the slander being spread ranged from adultry to gay escapades I felt as though everyone was looking at me wondering where my penis had been and I had to explain all my whereabouts. From that point on I felt the real "Love" among the brotherhood as there was no possible other scenario and as a result I had to be extricated at all cost. I too was surprised "How sure of my guilt they were". In the end I did not get DFed, but for years I was treated like I should have been. All this damaged me and now I know what it is to be a "SilentLamb"

HQ

33

Is it wrong of me to think of the GB, the Writing Department, Bethelites, Pioneers, as moochers, and leeching bloodsuckers?

by miseryloveselders in

jw
friends

i'm exhausted right now.

it's been a very long day.

both physically, and mentally, althought the latter otweighted the former by tons.

Hiding Questioner

Good thread!

"It's just that when I think of Jesus' life on earth, and the 1st Century Christians, I find it hard to imagine them having the same expectations of their brethren that the heavyweights in this organization expect of their lower ranked brethren."

I am reminded of a recent assembly that gave a demonstration encouraging family heads to quit their jobs if they found they could not get time off for the Friday sessions. In the demonstration the brother did quit his job, had no job to fall back on, attended, and later found, within days, another job.

Really?

HQ

55

Elders Can Hide their Own Sins from the Past-Yet Continue as Elders? Read

by flipper in

jw
friends

i was shocked ( though i probably shouldn't have been ) when reading the new elders manual concerning whether elders have to confess up about former sins from a few years earlier.

notice this on pg.

38 , paragraph 19 : it states, " if it comes to light or an appointed brother confesses that he has committed a disfellowshipping offense years in the past : the body of elders may determine he can continue to serve if the following is true : the immorality or other serious wrongdoing occured more than a few years ago, and he is genuinely repentant, recognizing that he should have come forward immediately when he sinned.

Hiding Questioner

I have a very good question, what if an elder and his wife did the deed before they got married, will his wife get off the hook too?

I may be able to help. And, though not exactly the same, maybe close.

During my JC "hearing" for doing the "deed" before marriage (my wife being the one to confess after 7 years of marriage), it came to light that I had been previously married yet no proof of being "scriptually free" when I got remarried. Suddenly our joint husband/wife JC hearing turned into an unexpected JC on just me. After over an hour of deliberations, out came the verdict; I was OK and not going to be DFed.

...as it was my "fornication" with my now wife that freed me to remarry and thus when I married I was free to remarry.

And, though they did not admit this, the fact that earlier in the evening they accepted my wife and my repentance over our pre-marriage indiscretions, they now found it difficult to DF me while allowing my wife to not be DF. This was a sort of "double jeoperdy" situation that seems to have worked out for me. Your mileage may vary.

HQ

39

strange comment from elder at the meeting today

by Evidently Apostate in

jw
friends

todays watchtower was especially nauseating but during the study one of them made the comment concerning the big a " jehovahs timetable is not contingent on all nations being saturated by the good news".

the study conductor reafirmed his point and then continued.. wait a fuggin minute!

there are 1.4 billion chinese on the earth and only 40 million profess christianity.

Hiding Questioner

"emptyinside, how about asking why are we still pounding on doors if he [Jehovah] already knows who will live in the paradise, it makes the ministry a test of faith for jw's only"

For years the only way I could get me mind to comprehend this was to tell myself that the "Truth' was simply a "watering hole" provided to enable all those who wanted to worship Jehovah today (vs tomorrow in the New System) could come together to worship and not necessarily to serve and save lives. This was the only way I could cope. For me all would be saved but for the actual wicked, some of whom would be JWs.

HQ

76

This is scary we are to put the GB in the same place as Jesus according to the Dec 15 WT

by life is to short in

i do not know how to scan the wt if someone can it would be great but i wrote it out verbatim .

i think what the wt says speaks for its self.

am i missing something and or reading something into what they are saying.

Hiding Questioner

Did David Splane really say this???...

" You will listen to the voice of the Governing Body as though it is the voice of God"

HQ

96

Marital Due and the KS

by yknot in

i just did a 'quick' search and 'marital due' doesn't appear to have made the 'list' of issues addressed in the ks!.

did i miss something?????

shouldn't the blantant repeated refusal (not justifiable under illness, ability, or discernable reason) be an issue addressed?.

Hiding Questioner

Opps! Not sure what just happened.

Reposting the correct portion of bad paragraph...

"One thing that no one seems to have commented on is what happens to a JW when and if his wife leaves him. In the JW religion the pain one is suffering is magnified by the knowlege that you cannot get on with your life. Even though we are the victim it is the victim that must pay a double painful price in that we are labelled through slander first and then prevented from entering into any other meaningful relationship unless we forgo all self-respect and human dignity by resorting to actions soley to meet the "two witness" rule that I personally found offensive, dangerous, costly, time consuming and too painful to accept. So, I was told to live my life unnaturally with the supposed consolation that my ex was not only going to die at the Big A (which, because I loved her, did not want to happen) and that she was responsible for my ultimate death at the Big A once I entered into another marriage."

HQ